The Wit and Wisdom of Nick Gillespie

by Will Wilkinson on January 30, 2009

In an interview at Splice Today, Nick Gillespie’s lays out the objectively correct response to Joseph Lowery’s crowd-pleasing inaugural benediction doggerel:

What the hell was that? An unpublished Nipsey Russell rhyme from a lost episode of The $100,000 Pyramid? Yellow will be mellow? When the Jew can drink Mountain Dew? The wop can be a cop? The kraut can give a shout?

[...]

I realize Lowery is an old man and I cut him some slack for all the crap that he and too many others like him had to deal with for far too long. But I think we’ve hit that day where black is not asked to go back. And Asians, those poor, sad-sack model minorities, don’t have to be any more mellow than the fans at a Ted Nugent concert. That’s good news.

And Nick’s rhetorical delicacy enables him to put into subtle perspective the proper place of politics in human life:

[W]e believe that politics—a rotten, zero-sum game in which the winners rub the losers’ face in dog shit like a schoolyard bully—should not be the primary focus of human activity. It should be squeezed into the smallest box possible so that individuals and the communities they form can get on with far more interesting and exciting and liberatory stuff. 

So knit a sweater without a picture of the president on it, fools.

  • Amicus
    "Wit" and "wisdom"? Your penchant for parody slays me, Will.

    The latest gurgling drain, in a long, contemporary pipeline, who believes that there are no problems with race, really, just those made up. So much, that we do not even have to pray for healing, tolerance, or justice.

    We're not talking about moral progress. You're just in a hurry, it looks like, to join the conservatives in declaring and end to moral progress.

    And the source of it cuts deep, based on this painfully thin moral cigarette.

    "No. My tears are reserved for my children and the people who have to interact with me on a regular basis (I feel almost as sorry for them as I do for myself)."
  • Greg N.
    Like many others, Gillespie was, of course, a fan of the Teaser. I just can't help that.
  • Aww man, I miss the Teaser. Especially the Boaz firing prank.
  • Mari Dupont
    Nick is a hoot, in addition to being easy on the eyes. I can't imagine why he still hasn't gone up against John Stewart; I guess he needs to write a book to get considered for a guest spot...
  • Paul O'Pinion
    Nothing to add. Breezy, funny and correct. A very good read.
blog comments powered by Disqus

Previous post:

Next post: